I remember one early spring day going out to my mailbox to look for a very late child support check. I was upset and even angry. Laban, it seemed, held all the cards.
Then I opened my box and there was the front cover to my very first book. I remember looking at it, the sun warm on my cheek, reflecting off the glossy print; I saw my own name in big, bold type along the bottom. He can't hurt me anymore.
I Plugged in the tea kettle, realizing for the first time just how great, how dreadfully deep, how black and immense my fear as a single mother really was. I'd been living in the shadow of starvation and with the fear of homelessness, worry for my children's welfare always driving me to work harder, save more, juggle, skimp, go without.
Unlike Jacob, I didn't have a Rachel to talk to, or even a Leah. But I had God talking to me. "I will allow him to cheat," God whispered gently in the warmth of that early spring afternoon..."but, Brenda, I will never let him harm you. Ever."
We can feel abandoned and orphaned, unheard from and insignificant in the great big world. But God whispers...and we know that we are safe, because none of us are ever without help.
AUTHOR: Brenda Wilbee
Comments